A Transformer Wrap Poem

Diabetes over at the Don Murphy forums has posted a rather odd poem marking the wrap of principle photography on Transformers. If your not a fan of the movie then the poem is probably for you. In short, its blames Director Michael Bay for bad decisions and Dreamworks Head of Production Adam Goodman for giving Bay total control, resulting in making a movie that is "still loads of crap." An example would be indications that Bay has final say on all casting decisions.

While the film script I read and Bay's recent history isn't exactly a confidence lifter, I have hopes he will tap his "The Rock" past and create a kick-butt movie and abandon his attempts to prove what an artist he is when trying to explore the human condition. That isn't his thing and he needs to quit trying to make it so. Any case, I still have hope for the film. There may be more to the poem but it seems a bit insider for my understanding so if people have a clue, please share.

The poem:

The film is a wrap?
Wow how about that!
It’s still loads of crap.
And the Stooges swallow this pap?

Murphy and Desanto lead the cheerleader charge
While Skorponok takes credit by and large.
The fact is today
There is nothing okay
The content of the film’s not fit for a barge.

Let your sugary friend answer the clamor
All you sweet kiddles want in on the drama?
The trouble beginning to end
Is named A-D-A-M Goodman

New studio head Snider
Decided him to fire
But then in a Hail Mary pass
Goodman kissed the right piece of ass

“Do not fire me, no do not please”
The chubby young Goodman said on his knees
I can do something you don’t want to do
I can control Michael Bay just for you.

New studio head Snider
Knew he’s a liar
But decided to stay out of the mess
“Sure Mr. Chubwon, you control Bay-san
And keep this boy’s movie shit off my dress”

Then dumb Mr. Goodman
As only a dunce can
Proceeded to hide in the sand
For the first time in history
It was a complete mystery
How one director had ALL of the power!!!!!!

The film is what it is and that’s all that it is
Most trufans will want to take a long whiz
And though valiant and Brave Tom Ian and Don slaved
Fact is Goodman gave the keys to the Kingdom to Bayed.

If you hate the dumb story
And realize the characters are a worry
And wonder how Bay could screwup so bad
Remember the missive that Sugarboy brought you
It wasn’t just Michael but Goodman too!

Thanks Shan for the link.